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I Bleed Ashes

The bus, the room, my death
The eyes, the face, the voice
The look.

Reality bound by pain and despair,
The storm before the apocalypse,
Future glowing with darkness.

It burns when the blade parts the skin,
I bleed ashes..

The bus, the room, my death
The eyes, the face, the voice
The look

Our faces are painted,
Lively colours on the lifeless,
Naked

Words cunningly bare but teeming with incantations.
Dont you know your mouth spits fire?

The bus, the room, my death
The eyes, the face, the voice
The look

We transcend meaning and coherence,
Lost in belonging,
Despondent.

Silence played on minor chords,
I relish your presence.

In your eyes celestial projections,
In your face the present,
In your voice horoscopes.

In the bus we were well met,
In the room I watched,
In my death I hold secrets.

The look…our restless oblivion.

I bleed ashes.

Authors Note
Whenever I write I draw from strong meaningful experiences that I cannot communicate merely by words, in art I believe something that language cannot capture seeps through, like injecting an experience from myself straight to you the reader. Many times these experiences linger in a form of haunting dreams and imagination or voices. That has not happened much when it came to me writing poems but has come across a lot in my novel writing. I found writing this poem rewarding and freeing in an artistic sense. This is probably my fourth poem ever, I rarely write poems but when I do it is from a place I rarely visit and scary for me to. I will have to admit there is a phobia there of emotional intensity, or losing myself in the idea that not a word I put to paper resonates even close to the experience I want to communicate.

To clarify…
On my “Confessions ” post I talked about how I wasn’t doing so well in terms of my mental health and I was taking a break from writing. Not long after that post I published eight posts in seven days which must have been surprising or confusing to some of you. The posts I published were my MX7 posts, I had promised to publish seven posts in seven days, they were already written when I published that post. This post today also from something I wrote a while ago.
How am I doing? I am still heaving my forward, trying to pull myself out of darkness. I will return to writing soon though, the only thing harder than writing is not writing.

Thanks for reading

Now I will leave you with a lyric that may or may not have anything to do with this post:

” ‘Dead as dead can be,’ my doctor tells me
But I just can’t believe him.” – A Perfect Circle ‘Passive’

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9 thoughts on “I Bleed Ashes

    1. To get a bottle idea of the stuff that influences my poetry listen to following songs in their order.

      1. Tool- Schism
      2. Neurosis – Water is not Enough
      3. Cult of Luna – Adrift

      This poem was a very personal one for me.
      And also I used to be in a band.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’ve listened to them all and love the lyrics to Tool’s Schism. Wish I’d written that myself! Water is not enough has an amazing ending but I know I’d have to be in the mood to listen to them a lot (yeah, showing my age). Cult of Luna rocks (or, something πŸ™‚ ). Are you a guitar player? I intend to be a musician in my next life. I can do it, I know! Thanks so much for the music treat. I’m always happy to listen and do love what I consider “alternative” music!

        Liked by 1 person

        1. I was a vocalist and writer, I was heavily involved in the process.
          Neurosis is one of my most respected, revered and loved bands. They are considered to have pioneered the genre by some. Been listening to them since 2012 and to tell you the truth it took me time to get into their stuff and appreciate it. It’s always hard with them to choose a song or two for someone to listen to to get an idea of them, like many progressive and post metal bands they evolve and hone their craft. Tool and Cult of Luna rock, that is for sure.

          Like

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